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To You, Lord We Commit

God’s time is everything. No man knows the day or hour that he will move, just the absolutely certainty that he will.

He has never stopped working toward the imminent end of the deception that built a false kingdom by power, influence, charisma and unlimited financial resources. Such a facade, cloaked as a great work of God, does not fall easily.

It has been excruciating for the hundreds of people who left the ROC “church” over the past 5+ year. I wrote about my experience in a blog last January, that can be read here. When I shared my experience it was from a redemptive lens and I see now that God was preparing me for the healing work he is doing now.

My time at this massive, once hailed the “fastest growing church in North America“, was relatively short-lived compared to many. I group I once proudly aligned myself with, is now a place I emphatically disassociate myself from. Continue reading →

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Happy Mother’s Day

I love the beautiful diversity in my friends. Every one unique in their own way. Here’s a snapshot of how some of them might be planning to enjoy their Mother’s Day:

Hiking to a pristine mountain vista, escaping for a long motorcycle ride, partaking of a lush, fully bodied red wine with a long, smooth finish, basking in the warm sun as waves crashed to the shore, indulging in a soul soothing facial, massage or manicure/pedicure, buying something pretty, fragrant or shiny, digging in the rich, fertile earth planting flowers in a garden, curling up in a quiet corner with a good book and a hot cup of tea, heading for an adventure in the city, hosting a festive party or feasting at a favorite restaurant.

Some will be celebrating their relationships with their mom while others will be grieving those that have passed on. Some will feel the ache of longing to be moms while others will quietly hope the “holiday” and all its reminders passes uneventful. Photo Jul 22, 8 34 53 AMToday is exactly one month shy of my mother being gone two years so it still feels raw to me. I’m not sure that will ever be different. I miss my mother every single day.

To each of my fearfully and wonderfully made friends and those of you I so thoroughly enjoy in the blogsophere, here’s to you however you choose spend your Mother’s Day… with your mom, with your children or neither. May each of us find (some) fond memories as we reflect on those who have given us life.

Wherever you are and whatever you find yourself doing, I trust you will make it an exceptional day!

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Threads of Time

We begin life as one solitary, resplendent strand. Through years, events and experiences countless threads are added; vivacious colors of victory and celebration and muted hues of sorrow and disappointment; all becoming part of a more eloquent design. At times this picturesque imaginary is very alive to me.

020We carry each memory (strand) in our heart and they become part of us. They are moments that capture us and transcend time and space, potent enough to sweep us up again and again in the waves of emotion that swirl around them.

While no memory remains quite as powerful as when we first experienced it they are forever etched on our souls and make us who we are.

021Time and distance eventually soften the sorrow of loss and mourning, dulling those unspoken aches with no resolve. Equally, moments of supreme joy and rapture eventually fade into the routine of the day dampening the thrill that once brought emotional elation.

Continue reading →

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My WordPress Family!

In this electronic generation where tweeting, texting, instagram and facebook are the standard for communication – I found my way to the blogosphere. Within this limitless domain, thousands have established a new kind of community.

It cannot be denied that there are many negative repercussions from pseudo socialization that has often served to isolate people more. Yet, the blogging world has opened a brilliant medium of communication and random connection with “strangers” who become family in a manner we could never have dreamed of 30 years ago.

I’m not sure how I found some of the blogs I follow or how they found me. The beginning is less relevant than the reality that we now enjoy a common bond of reciprocal interest and camaraderie. Our shared vulnerability infuses strength and perpetuates encouragement.

I miss my blogging family when I’m distracted by life and I am away from the blogroll too long. And, I eagerly anticipate acknowledgement of my ramblings when I wade back into the depths once again. Continue reading →

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A Belated Hello

It’s been too long since I sat at my keyboard and Sunday evening is not an optimal time to do so. However, I wanted to touch base with my fellowship of bloggers whom I have inadvertently neglected over the last few weeks.

I don’t know where the time went as I read through the blogroll this morning. It’s good to be caught up once again with what’s going on with each of you. Is it strange that I’ve missed all this? I love your stories, the way you open your lives and share your heart and experiences. I follow the changes that you describe and often feel closer to you than many other acquaintances in my circle. What a gift.

As for me, I must be intentional about not allowing myself to not be distracted by recent events in my community that led over 800 people to read one particular blog I wrote in a matter of hours. I am the first to admit, I found myself captivated as the numbers soared.

Continue reading →

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One Piece of The Puzzle at a Time

I am a woman of faith, first and foremost. It’s not that I believe there is no use for secular wisdom, I simply choose to be selective about what I am willing to embrace as truth for my life.

Although I would never lay a foundation for perception of God, myself or others based exclusively on a concept formed by other skewed humans, as I have worked in human services, first with youth with substance abuse issues and now adults with intellectual disabilities, I have gleaned a few nuggets from those who are educated to dissect and define human behavior.

In such obscure ramblings, an occasional aromatic waft of wisdom rises from the insight of one whose world view excludes a lens of faith. Such spontaneous interactions can unknowingly fill a void of understanding like discovering the missing ingredient to a favorite recipe. Continue reading →